


Leave Your Lover

by mickeysfine



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Happy Ending, M/M, heard this song, sadmickey, sorry - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-19
Updated: 2018-01-21
Packaged: 2019-03-06 16:17:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,354
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13414989
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mickeysfine/pseuds/mickeysfine
Summary: Ok so I heard this song 'Leave Your Lover' by Sam Smith and I fell in love and I just had to make this. Listen to it !!! Basically Ian is in a relationship with Trevor and Mickey is in love with him but Ian doesn't know. Also we're going to pretend Ian and Mickey are just best friends.





	1. Chapter 1

_I don't have much to give , but I don't care for gold_

_What use is money , when you need someone to hold?_

 

Mickey was not lonely. Okay ... maybe he was. But he definitely wasn't admitting that. Honestly , he was doing quite fine. He had his own apartment , still in the Southside but it was just far enough that he didn't have any unwanted memories. He also had a job. He worked as a mechanic at the auto shop a few blocks away. He even managed to scrap up enough cash to buy a car , a shitty one , but a car nonetheless.

Only one thing was missing. No , someone.

No matter how many times he denied it to his sister and "friends" , he yearned for love. His bed was cold at night and he was tired of coming home to silence. He just wished he would find someone to love him so that he could replace the emptiness with happiness.

_Don't have direction , I'm just rolling down this road._

_Waiting for you to bring me out of the cold._

 

Everything was routine for Mickey.

Wake up , shower , get dressed , eat breakfast , go to work , come home , eat dinner , sleep. An on going cycle of emptiness. He had this feeling that this was all there was for him. The last stop. That feeling was eating at him. He was only 26 and already done with life.

Sometimes on the weekend his bestfriend would convince him to come out with him.

Ian Gallagher.

The most perfect human being on the entire planet. He had the brightest red hair Mickey had ever seen and the most dazzling and hypnotic green eyes that could make anyone fall head over heels. He was one of those people.

The problem? They were bestfriends. Nothing more , nothing less. Oh , and to put the icing on the cake Ian had a boyfriend. A boyfriend that made him happy. Who was Mickey to ruin that?

Ian didn't know Mickey had these thoughts and he didn't want him to. But sometimes , maybe just once , Ian would ask what Mickey was thinking.

 

_You'll never know the endless nights , the rhyming of the rain'_

_Or how it feels to fall behind and watch you call his name._

 

Ian had the most beautiful smile Mickey had ever seen. Mickey loved seeing Ian happy. When Ian felt good , so did Mickey.

Until he got home. All alone , face strained from smiling to keep Ian from worrying. The worst thing about seeing Ian happy was when he knew he wasn't the one causing it. Ian loved Trevor. Mickey could see it in his eyes and the way he says his name. He only wished he said his name that way , or looked at him that way.

Mickey was hurting. But the thing that broke his heart the most , was loving Ian.

 

_Pack up and leave everything,_

_Don't you see what I can bring_

_Can't keep this beating heart at bay._

 

Mickey didn't know how much more he could take. How many more times he could go out with Ian and Trevor and pretend everything is fine. How many times he can lie to Mandy saying he didn't need anyone. How many more nights he could sit alone in his small apartment.

His heart just couldn't take it. Why does everyone else get to be happy? When will he get his happy ending? How many more nights of telling himself , "Get over it , it'll never happen." His mind needed a break. H e was mentally and emotionally drained. 

How many times can a heart break?

 

_Set my midnight sorrow free ,_

_I will give you all of me._

_Just leave you lover , leave him for me._

_Leave your lover , leave him for me._

 

If Mickey had Ian , there would be no such thing as "not enough sleep." There wouldn't be any staying up all night staring at the ceiling trying to figure out where you went wrong. He wouldn't lay awake hoping that maybe just maybe Ian felt the same thing for him. He could finally be happy.

Mickey would give Ian everything he had , its not much , but if Ian asked he would have it. He knew Ian was happy , but for his own selfish reasons he wished Trevor didn't make Ian smile that much , so that Ian leave him and be with Mickey. That's all he's ever wanted and all he's ever needed.

Ian's all he's ever wanted. All he's ever needed.

 

_We sit in bars and raise our drinks to growing old_

_Oh, I'm in love with you and you will never know_

 

Its Ian's 25th birthday and they are celebrating at the Alibi. The whole Gallagher clan is there , Kev , V , Mandy , and Trevor. Mickey sits beside Ian and slings his arm around his shoulder. Trevor is off talking to Fiona so he can finally have Ian to himself , even if its not for the reason he wished it was.

 _Happy Birthday , Ian_ , he says because despite everything they are still best friends. Ian lays his head on Mickey's shoulder and sighs contently. Its moments like this where Mickey forgets everything. All the sadness , emptiness , loneliness , and anger and just focuses on the things he does have. And he's rather have Ian as a friend than nothing at all.

Ian looks up at him and for a second , Mickey thinks he sees his eyes light up a bit when they lock eyes. But then its gone as soon as it arrives. Ian lies his head back on Mickeys shoulder and its there Mickey knows that he will never stop loving Ian.

And Ian doesn't even have a clue.

 

_But if I can't have you I'll walk this life alone_

_Spare you the rising storms and let the rivers flow_

_You'll never know the endless nights , the rhyming of the rain ,_

_Or how it feels to fall behind and watch you call his name_

 

Mickey leaves the alibi , earlier than he could have. But sitting there , watching Ian laugh and enjoy his birthday with Trevor and his family , he realized something. He wasn't good enough for Ian. He knew that deep down , he just kept denying it. But know he knows , and there's no avoiding it. He's fucked up. 

Has a fucked up life , a fucked up past , and probably a fucked up future. Ian doesn't deserve that. He deserves much more.

So he told Ian that he had to go , _Goodbye._ He could see the worry in Ian eyes but told him that there's no need to worry.

But maybe there is. Because Mickey doesn't think he'll come back.

 

_Pack up and leave everything_

_Don't you see what I can bring_

_Can't keep this beating heart at bay_

 

Mickey couldn't take it anymore. He couldn't take the heartbreak and the pain , knowing Ian would never be his. He loved and that was his mistake. He avoided Ian's phone calls , his lease was almost up anyway so he ended up moving farther away from the southside , away from Ian. All things Ian hurt , so he avoided all things Ian. Whenever Mandy bought him up , Mickey would try and change the subject. He missed Ian , but he felt like everything was crashing down on him.

He knew Ian didn't love him the same way. 

The worst of it all though , was knowing Ian would never leave the one he loves , for someone who is in love with him.

 

_Set my midnight sorrow free,_

_I will give you all of me_

_Just leave your lover , leave him for me_

_Leave your lover , leave him for me._

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There were alot of requests for a chapter 2. This will be in Ian's POV after Mickey left.

_This is Mickey. If I missed your call then I'm probably doing important shit. I'll get back to you. Or I won't._

 

-BEEP-

 

Ian doesn't know how many times he's heard Mickey's voicemail over the past few days. After that night at the alibi , Mickey seemed to be MIA. Ian can remember the look on Mickey's face when he told him he had to leave. Mickey's eyes were sad and he could tell the smile was forced. He wanted to see if Mickey was okay but got dragged away by Fiona and Debbie.

Ian couldn't help but feel guilty. He didn't even know what he did but Mickey wouldn't just up and disappear. He talked to Mandy and she told him he didn't know where Mickey was. He had a feeling that wasn't the whole truth but he didn't want to pressure her. He didn't know what else to do at this point so here he was on a Saturday night sitting at the kitchen table and staring at his phone screen.

Ian heard Lip bounding down the steps and looked up.

"Hey dude , what's up?" Lip said while over to the fridge , grabbing a beer.

Ian sighed and shook his head. "Nothing really. Mickey still isn't answering my calls."

Lip turned around a took a sip of his beer. He shrugged. "Mickey was always one to bolt when things got bad. I don't blame him for leaving."

Ian blinked at lip. "What? What are you talking about?"

Lip looked at Ian like it was the most obvious answer in the world. "Stop acting like you haven't noticed."

Ian was beyond confused at this point. "Noticed what?"

Lip rolled his eyes and walked around the counter to sit across from Ian , beer still in hand. "The looks Mickey gives you? The way he always does what you want to do? How he always third wheeled with you and Trevor? He's totally in love with you."

Ian stared at Lip and scoffed. No way. Lip had to be fucking with him.  Mickey was not in love with him. Right? I mean , of course Ian knew Mickey was gay but he gave that dream up a long time ago. Mickey was the full package. With those bright blue eyes nobody could say no to , paired with the dark raven hair he was gorgeous.

Ian knew he wasn't bad looking but lets face it , he looked like an alien. Even Mickey said it. Not to mention he's bipolar. He knew Mickey deserved better so he never tried to start anything between them other than a friendship. Ian thought he was imagining those longing looks in Mickey eyes and the when they walked side by side Mickey would brush they're hands together. When Mickey went out with him and Trevor he thought it was because he wanted to. Now that he was really giving it thought though , who would want to be a third wheel. Maybe Mickey did feel the same way.

No. Lip needed to stop giving Ian false hope.

Ian shook his head and looked down. "No way , Lip. We're best friends. That's it."

Lip shrugged again. "That doesn't mean he didn't have stronger feelings. It probably hurt seeing you happy with Trevor knowing what he felt for you. You must have suspected even the smallest bit that he wanted more."

All of this was too much for Ian. Now that Lip was saying all this he was staring to put the puzzle pieces together.

"Shit." 

 

\---------------------

 

 

Ian was conflicted. After finding out that Mickey possibly had feelings for him , he couldn't get it out of his head.

Sure , he liked Trevor. He wasn't bad in bed , he was sweet and he accepted Ian's illness. But Ian knew Trevor was just temporary. He didn't want to hurt Trev , he really didn't but he knew that Mickey was more important.

That's how he found himself outside of Trevor's house taking a deep breath. He walked up the stairs and knocked on the door.

Trevor came outside and smiled. "Hey , babe. What are you doing here?"

Ian sighed. "We should talk."

Trevor must have noticed the look on his face. "You wanna come in? Everything okay?"

"Yeah everything's okay , but uh , I think I better stay out here."

Trevor sighed and crossed his arms over his chest. "You're breaking up with me aren't you?"

"I'm sorry."

"No you're not. This is because of Mickey isn't it?"

Ian silence must have been answer enough.

Trevor shook his head. "I knew this would happen. I saw the way he looked at you."

Did everyone know except for Ian?

"Ian come on. He left. He doesn't care about you."

Trevor's voice snapped Ian back from his thoughts.

"Maybe. But I care about him."

"You know what , fuck you. You guys deserve each other."

Trevor had a right to be angry. "I really am sorry , Trevor."

Ian didn't get a reply. Trevor just walked into his house and slammed the door.

 

\---------------

 

Ian decided to call Mandy when he got back.

"Hello?" Mandy sounded a little tired.

"Hey, sorry did I wake you?"

"Yeah , whatever I was taking a nap. You okay?"

"Yeah , I'm fine I just need to talk to you."

"Okay..."

Ian didn't beat around the bush. "I need you to tell me where Mickey is."

Mandy sighed. "Ian , I already told you .."

Ian huffed. "Look Mandy , I understand he probably told you not to tell me where he is or whatever but I really need to talk to him. I don't have time for the bullshit , so just tell me."

It was quiet on the other line for a little bit.

"Fine , but you better fix this shit."

 

\-----------------

 

Mickey didn't live that much farther from his old apartment so Ian didn't have much trouble finding it. On his way there he was nervous and almost turned back around. He kept telling himself that he missed Mickey and wanted his best friend back.

He pulled up to the apartment building and asked the lady at the front desk what apartment Mickey was in. He walked up to the second floor and stood outside of the door. After about 3 minutes he built up the confidence to knock. He heard some shuffling behind the door and some incoherent grumbling. Ian took a deep breath when the door opened.

There stood Mickey , eyes wide and in pajamas , staring at Ian in total shock.

Ian smiled sheepishly and rubbed the back of his neck.

 

'"Hey , Mick."

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also sorry that I used tractor. I hate him too , I was just too lazy to make my own character. Also follow me on tumblr https://www.tumblr.com/blog/heymickeyusofine. I decided to also make a 3rd chapter.

**Author's Note:**

> I will be updating Marcy and Burn It All , Baby soon. I've just been really stressed about school and I haven't been getting much sleep. So so sorry. Hope you enjoyed this !


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